Tanner Friesen

AUSTIN, Texas — It’s time for a story – when I was 32, I blew my life up (on purpose). I ended a 3.5-year relationship, picked a new career path and decided I wanted to move from Massachusetts to a new part of the country.

I ended up moving to Austin, and road tripped down here with my dad during COVID (April, 2020). Once here, the city was on lock down till mid-summer or so. As I didn’t know anyone, I decided to start to attend car events around the city because well, I’m a BIG car guy.

In doing so, I met some people who saw one of my Instagram stories one day where I was playing soccer at Zilker and said “Hey, you should check out Sphere – my friend Mike’s soccer inspired fitness concept”. I said sure why not and was introduced to Tanner.

From here on, Tanner would become one of my closest friends here in Austin. And if you’re new here– Society stories is the brainchild of Secret Disco Society (which is run by Tanner and Brooklyn). Society stories is aimed at telling stories of the community here in Austin, many of which attend the Secret Disco Society events around town.

Now that the stage is set, this article isn’t about me – it’s about Tanner, so let me explain. Today is Tanners Birthday. In the spirit of his birthday, I thought – why not do a quick society article with some wise “Tanner-ism’s”

A Tanner-ism is a piece of advice that Tanner provides on various topics or situations, typically – always short worded, but with deep backing that inspires inner evocation.

So, now – without further delay, let’s get into some Tanner-ism’s.

“If it’s that much work, it’s wrong.”
We all have situations in life whether it be work, relationships or just general shit that comes up that requires excessive amounts of work. For me, the Tanner-ism of “if it’s that much work, it’s wrong” hits home. Sure, you must put the work in – but the work should be helping you not hurting you. If something isn’t flowing or doesn’t seem to be inline with energy or personalities or just feels like it’s going against the grain – it’s not right, and you need to remove it from your life.

“You won’t”
This Tanner-ism is something that he says with a slight grin and an egging on sort of tone – Tanner drops this ism’ whenever someone articulates that they want to do something that maybe puts them out of their comfort zone. “I’m going to go talk to that girl and ask her out” – You won’t. “I’m going to run the Austin Marathon next year.” You won’t. “I’m going to start that business” You won’t. The ‘you wont’s’ are offered in a fun motivation way that is meant to push people out of their zones and into the uncomfortable -which is where most growth happens.

“How can I help?”
If you don’t know Tanner, one thing he isn’t is selfish – the guy is a machine and is always willing to help anyone out on a project or goal they have, and sometimes at the expense of his time. Being creative is all about finding and inspiring passion in yourself, but also in others – it fuels the inner creativeness we all possess, and Tanner leverages this ism’ to help others fill their tank and is always willing to lend a hand throughout any phrase of the process.

“Pick up your pants and walk faster”
Tanner’s first job was painting back when he was living in North Dakota – his boss used this uniquely direct phrase often to essentially inspire you to stop complaining, start moving and get it done. We all can and do struggle with procrastinating from time to time – but this is a reminder that you must get that mindset out of your mentality, pull your pants up and keep up.

“What do you want to do tomorrow?”
When Tanner moved to Austin, he too didn’t know anyone outside of one friend. He had gotten out of a long-term relationship and once arriving here, he was searching for purpose and inspiration and grabbed dinner one night with a friend who asked him a simple question “What do you want to do tomorrow? As Tanner paused – the friend said “You don’t know what makes you happy, you need to get back to that place”

As Tanner will tell you, this simple phrase…“Changed my life, man.” – it focused him to look inside and find out what makes him happy, what he wants to do, who he wants to be and how he wants to spend his time. This Tanner-ism is borrowed, but still holds weight in the fabric of what makes Tanner, Tanner.

So, the piece of advice I’ll pass forward to you, that Tanner passed forward to me – is the same. What do you want to do tomorrow? Are you living your passion? Are you doing what makes you, you? If you’re not, I just have one thing to say to you…

“You won’t.”